Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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