I want to walk on stilts...naked
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
