well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
