eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
