The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize