whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
