How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
