Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
