I wannas sexs uuuuu
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
