I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
