but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Randomize
