does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
