is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I forgot how hot balto sounded
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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