Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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