whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
