I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Randomize