oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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