I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
