When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
