We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
