The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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