I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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