No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
