Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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