I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
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well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.