I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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