Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
