my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
