Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
