He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
