Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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