But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
