wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
