Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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