I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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