Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
