the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize