we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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