you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
