Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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