who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
