He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
