Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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