saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
