eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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