U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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