Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
