I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
