i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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