she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I enjoy the company of your penis
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
