hotel room ftw
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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