dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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