We're facebook friends in real life
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
we're making bets on your personal life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize